one thing to keep in mind though is that some players might not be able to keep in character. for example I had a rouge player using bluff and disguise to pretend to be a bard; but some of my other players who failed their sense motive rolls were still hostile to this character.

Disintegrate their Heart Rule

I used to run Dark Sun campaigns where all players get psionic powers. It was possible, if the player rolled perfectly on which power they get (something like two 00's in a row or something,) to start off with the ability to disintegrate things with their mind. Naturally, since all my players were cheaters, many of them had disintegrate and would use it every chance they got. So one day, they were fighting some gigantic monster and one of them said he wanted to disintegrate it. I ruled that the monster was too big to completely disintegrate but they power could destroy part of the monster equal to 50 hp. It was reasonable at the time since most of the players could deal over 50 damage a round (which is a lot by 2nd ed standards.) I used a similar rule for opening dimensional doors inside someone and trying to grab or stab organs. These rules seem to give players too much power, but they are double-ended swords for I used these tricks on the players many times, which was part of the reason they party would have to go through at least six character sheets per adventure (for a 3 player party.) Despite how ridiculous that sounds most or all of us had fun.

Looks Like We Destroyed Another Bar

Because intra-party fighting a big part of the campaign, as more PC's were killed before the quest officially started than during the adventure itself, and because the party members often met in bars bar fights were a major part of the game. Players would plan out characters specifically to survive the bar fight that was sure to precede the adventure. Eventually people stopped playing wizards altogether, which I felt was unfortunate but understandable - no one wants to be the one with 1d4 hit points when it's an every-creature-for-itself scenario. I felt the need to curb how many players were killed so I wanted to install a mechanism that forced the party to not fight and achieve some non-combat goal and perhaps cooperate. Sending in militias and peacekeepers only got the players more riled up and encouraged them to all fight to the death in a bold stand against authority. Sometimes I wouldn't have to plan adventures - the party would just pick fights with who ever is enforcing the laws and just fight until everyone's dead or jailed forever. What I decided to do was instate a rule that whenever a bar fight breaks, a fire gets set somehow. Round after round the fire will grow and soon the entire bar will be burning. If the players don't stop fighting the bar will eventually pancake and collapse (this was before 9-11), and kill everyone. Entire crops were lost and I decided that the roof will collapse in and that, instead of just dying, everyone would take a ton of damage and have to climb out of the wreckage. And, lo and behold, they didn't finish each other off after emerging from the burnt timber - they stopped fighting. I discovered that destroying a bar was enough destruction to satisfy them for the time being and that burning a bar to the ground was an adequate substitute for killing each other. So whenever they met in a bar and were given a quest and decided to instead start fighting, I would just burn down the bar and let the survivors carry on on their merry way.

"You can create an artificial blush by using rouge; but a scoundrel who deserves to be called a rogue is unlikely to blush naturally."

In my defense Jon, I was new to roleplaying at the time and had barely learned to keep player knowledge and character knowledge separate :P

this is a fairly minor house rule, but it could be relevant for some people: The feat toughness kinda... well, sucks. In my old group we said anyone who takes toughness gets the 3 hp + their con modifier, because just 3hp is terrible. another version I heard was 3hp + # of HD a character has. Either one is fine by me, but I'm not a DM.

what msot people go by now is improved toughness from CW, which grants hp equal to your character level.

I think the 3.5 aging system is rather silly in that it implies that someone's sight and hearing actually become stronger as they age. Also, many professional athletes actually peak in their mid-30's. I figured the current aging system could use a bit of tweaking, so I came up with the following new one:

MIDDLE AGE:
One score of the player's choice increases by one.

OLD AGE:
All ability scores drop by one. One score of the player's choice increases by two, for a net increase of one.

VENERABLE AGE:
All ability scores drop by one. One score of the player's choice increases by one, for a net increase of zero.

house rule i'd like to implement:

If any of my characters are pregnant, I should be able to
a) get an abortion without losing exp (i should gain some if anything... it's a pretty big ordeal!)
b) able to throw baby showers in the middle of the campaign
c) make the bastard child's other parent pay monthly spousal/child support

=p three dragons are on their way... any suggestions for how I should prevent non lethal damage due to a literal fire crotch?

If any of my characters are pregnant, I should be able to
a) get an abortion without losing exp (i should gain some if anything... it's a pretty big ordeal!)

Getting exp for slaying fetuses? Remind me never to try to fight a whore. They must be level god-knows-what with more prestige classes than they have STDs

b) able to throw baby showers in the middle of the campaign
What about in combat? Is it improvised weapon?

c) make the bastard child's other parent pay monthly spousal/child support
does it apply to bastard swords?

I thought the father was a white dragon?

It's interesting you bring up these sex-related rules. I'm thinking of putting together a X-rated campaign and combat will be devalued in the place of sex. To make sex scenarios more interesting than plain skill checks I'm devising a system of "sex fighting".

All players get sex points equal to the value of their remaining hit points. When the sex points are used up the character is "done". HP damage affects sex points and sex point damage counts as nonleathal damage to HP.
All players get natural "attacks" for hands, mouth, and whatever genitals, orifices, and other features they possess. Different hands can be used to pleasure two targets or pleasure the same target twice, but there is a penalty applied and it requires a Dual Wield feat. Stimulating creatures with large or huge genitals requires the use of both hands unless the player has the Monkey Grip feat.
I'd like the idea of attacks to be skill based instead of centered on combat attack bonuses. Sex skill would use charisma as the main modifier and sex damage would have the charisma modifier added. Dex modifiers could be added for attacks involving digital stimulation like hand jobs or oral dexterity like blow jobs. Double fisting, on the other hand, would add str modifiers (1.5 the str modifier because it's requires two hands).
I was thinking that a will save against the DC of the skill check would be the only way to avoid sex damage.
Skills like Intimidation can be used to dom/domme an opponent and with an apporpriate skill trick can allow the play to cast dominate or inflict injury upon a dominated individual.
Diplomacy can be used to stop combat and begin intercourse (verbal and otherwise.)
Sex damage dealt will as unarmed damage typical to that character, but floggers or whips may provide additional damage.

I was thinking "yes" to experience for abortions, but there should also be experience granted for using contraceptive items or spells.

I'm still toying around with the sex fighting rules, so input is welcome.

I also think players should get exp for undergoing any form of labour. It's not so much about gaining exp that I am worried about, it is losing exp that worries me. Yeah, my first dragon hubbie was white but I was thinking about the red dragon egg I swallowed (so I could incubate it inside my stomach as a snake merlady). White dragons might freeze my lala but I think it would serve as a nice cooling system.

As for the sex fighting rules, you should design a separate set of stats for one's sexual abilities and feats for different positions harharhar. There's going to be a whole new implication to grapple checks.

OMG. Can I shoot lasers out of my crotch (magic missiles) or or turn my saliva into acid? >=)

mwahaha.

"Sex damage dealt will as unarmed damage typical to that character, but floggers or whips may provide additional damage."
careful with that one, otherwise monks and other martial artist classes will kind of slant the system.

Also, making a will save against the DC of the check will be a rather ineffective method for avoiding damage, as max skill ranks are equal to Class level + 3, while a good will save is equal to 1/2 Class levels + 2.

If you need help with it mechanics wise I can help out with the system.

Also Chichi, the origin point of spells from the body is never specified, so there is no reason you couldn't shoot lasers or fireballs out of your crotch even in regular D&D.

Now seriousness aside, Do we deal bonus humiliation damage with special tools, positions, or racial? And aside from intimidation is it possible to use some of the other skills aside intimidate for various sexual uses, such as using tumble to imitate an obscure kama sutra postion?

The possibilities really are endless :O

Haha, Fireballs.

On a more serious note. If such campaign will be done, then would there be influences from FATAL? Ie: circumference charts and so on.

Yeah, but different spells have different components (verbal, hand gestures... and all those other fancy terms) =(

omg. Tarek. Can people hide wands in body cavities?

(sigh. back to happy papers)

Needs more Black Tokyo with their Flow Witches. I'll let you figure out what they do. Here's a hint: There are certain periods of every month in which they grow more powerful.

To encourage players to take much-needed but much-maligned role of healer, I offer Clerics a free feat, as long as it is a Divine Feat (feats which require usage of Turn Undead but give abilities that are useful against all types of enemies).

Half-Elves, the poor bastard stepchild race of 3.5, get the Human's extra skill point per level (+3 additional at first level).